My hands are shaking. My heart is beating faster. My thoughts are racing a million miles a minute. I search for you, but I can’t find you in this place of darkness and utter confusion. Where are you Lord! I need you now, in this place, in this moment. How at this moment of my greatest need is it that I can’t find you. Do you even care that I am drowning? Does my problem even matter enough for you to reach out your hand to grab mine to say that it will be okay? What more do you need from me to just tell me that you care? I…